I failed to stop smoking, but I got down to two a day. I felt guilty and worried but my midwife told me not to give myself a hard time and that it wouldn't matter. When I was fretting about it, my partner reassured me it was all right. He knew that keeping me content would be best for me and the baby. When you are pregnant, you don't become a different person, suddenly able to say "no". If he had lectured me, I would have told him to piss off.

Julie Coveney, gave birth three months ago

I don't smoke, so I haven't experienced any tension in that respect. But we are currently bombarded with advice about what we should and shouldn't be doing. There is a huge amount of pressure. I didn't eat blue cheese, but one day I licked cake-mix off a spoon and felt bad because it contained raw eggs (a listeria risk). I had the odd half glass of wine and some cold meat. I already felt guilty enough, so if anyone told me off, I would have told them to leave me alone. I can't do it all.

Liz Blamire, four months into her second pregnancy

Everyone has an opinion on pregnancy, even complete strangers, which is very annoying. I am surprised to hear about a pregnant woman smoking but that's easy for me to say as a non-smoker. Emma is an adult and can make her own choices. There is nothing wrong with Ken voicing concern but I'm not saying he should have the last word; it's her body and her baby. I have the odd glass of wine, and I don't see any problem with that. My partner never comments on it, but if he did, I would be quite indignant.

Janette Dash, 23 weeks into her third pregnancy

I'm not a smoker and I don't like being in smoky places when pregnant, but I wouldn't like to be told not to do it. People can advise you, but you have to make your own decision based on what's best for you. I personally think that one glass of wine every once in a while isn't going to hurt you. There are stages in pregnancy, especially if working full-time, when it helps you feel less uptight and stressed. I think a partner would be justified in saying smoking is wrong, although perhaps not in public. Similarly with excessive drinking. If your partner can't quietly and diplomatically put it to you, who can?