Stop now if you're having breakfast, but I desperately needed to investigate my urine: it turned bright yellow after my kinesiology session. It's not often you need sunglasses to go to the loo, so questions had to be asked.
To be fair, it's not the only reason for returning to AlexSandra Rehlinger (020-7700 3079). My first treatment included analysis of my lifestyle, nutrition and irises, leaving little time for kinesiology, the study of the body's electromagnetic pathways, so I am, if you will, a work in progress.
But first things first: my urine. It was, I am told, the result of chewing a B-vitamin complex, not the start of a prostate problem. Neurosis over, we turn to the kinesiology. This time, the testing is more rigorous. After some gentle psychotherapy (more Lorraine Kelly then Anthony Clare), AlexSandra starts her work with a picture of my emotional state. Then she turns to my body. Perhaps 100 times over an hour, she pushes against muscles in my arms and legs, monitoring the reaction while I hold against my jaw containers of different substances, from minerals to dairy concentrates to Australian bush remedies. I'm no Stephen Hawking, but apparently we're all just a mass of electric energy, which reacts to vibrations of whatever's in the container, revealing vital information. It sounds odd, but sometimes my limbs are rock-solid, at others, when I hold a different container, they crumple like the Birmingham City back four.
As AlexSandra does the tests, she gives a commentary: "It's going, it's going", "Wow, hungry bunny" and, at the end, "OK, you're cooked." My God, I knew it was serious. As well as massaging different reflex points, she recommends digestive enzymes (stress may be reducing the nutritional benefit I get from food), gives me a mineral complex and plays a musical note to clear my heart chakra, which I try to visualise flowing through my body. Tests show that I need to cut down on dairy and switch to soya yogurt. Sweet Jesus. She says I'm too exhaus-ted to do a brown rice fast, which has to be a low point in any man's life.
A full programme will follow, but I leave with advice on acupressure to relieve stress and help digestion. "It's best before bed," she says. "Get someone to do them to you." And I will - I'm going to incorporate them into foreplay. It will be gastric rather than tantric sex. Sting, eat your heart out. And your B-vitamin complex.
My 17-year-old daughter has not grown since she had her growth spurt at 11. Are there any dietary guidelines that encourage growth?
Growth problems can be due to the pituitary and/or thyroid gland not functioning properly, so check with her GP. Cod liver oil has the vitamin A and D needed for tissue and bone growth; kelp will help if any iodine deficiency is affecting the thyroid. Deficiencies of zinc, calcium and magnesium can also cause growth problems. B complex, especially vitamin B6, promotes the uptake of amino acids for proper growth. For a local nutritionist, call the Institute of Optimum Nutrition, 020-8877 9993 www.patrickholford.com.
Two years ago, I had chemotherapy for breast cancer and now suffer from hot sweats. Are there natural remedies?
I, too, suffered from hot sweats for years after chemotherapy. I think it's due to the very strong drugs affecting the endocrine system, causing disruption in uniform hormone release, in particular by the ovaries. Sage can help to reduce hot sweats. Three times a day, drink 'tea' made with boiling water and one teaspoon of finely chopped fresh sage. Homeopathy helped rebalance my endocrine glands (contact the Society of Homeopaths: 01604 621400; info@homeopathy-soh.org).
Emma Mitchell is a natural health therapist. Send your questions to Wellbeing, Guardian Weekend, 119 Farringdon Road, London EC1R 3ER. Email: weekend@theguardian.com
