1. Holding

Holding is an intrinsic part of massage. Practised properly, it can be a very powerful and expressive technique that will help calm and centre yourself and your partner. We intuitively practice holding whenever we experience pain or strong emotions. In massage, holding can be used at the beginning of any sequence as a centering and grounding technique. For it to be effective you need to clear you head of thoughts and really focus on what you're doing.

You can hold for as little as 30 seconds, as long you believe you are mentally and physically connected to what you're trying to achieve. This technique can be applied to any part of the body (yours or your partner's).

If you are practising self-massage, find a quiet place, close your eyes and breath deeply. Try slowly bringing your hands up to either side of your face and enjoying the warmth that transfers from hands to face, face to hands. Alternatively, lay one hand across your forehead, the other supporting your head from behind and breathe slowly. Or simply lay both hands across your chest until you feel the warmth of your hands spreading through your chest to your heart.

If you're massaging someone else, start each sequence by gently holding your partner. If, for example, you're about to massage your partner's face, rest your hands gently on either side of their face and regulate your breathing for a few moments. You can also use holding as a way of bridging separate parts of the sequence, maintaining a seamless flow from one movement to the next.

2. Rubbing

This is a really easy technique because it's instinctive: when we're cold, we rub ourselves warm, when we're in pain, we rub the afflicted area. Rubbing speeds up your blood flow, which immediately increases oxygen levels in your body. It has a stimulating effect which is great when you're feeling low on energy, stagnant or listless.

This should be a dynamic movement. If you rub too lightly or too slowly you won't stimulate the blood flow; if you apply too much pressure, you won't reach the level of momentum you need. Find a level of pressure that works for you and maintain a consistent rhythm.

You can rub every part of the body. If you're lacking in energy, you can use this technique to invigorate the scalp and increase blood flow to the brain. If you have cramp in your legs or feet, rubbing is great for warming up tense muscles.

Use the flat of your hand or the edge of your palm to rub. If you're treating a smaller area, just use the middle part of two or three fingers.

A warming, energetic back rub can reinvigorate the entire body. Enlist the help of a partner or friend and, without putting any pressure directly on the spine, take turns in rubbing up and down either side of your partner's spine. So simple, yet amazingly effective.

3. Cupping and tapping

This is a vigorous technique used to re-energise the body. It's particularly useful if you're feeling anxious or worried as it shakes off nervous energy, improving your stature and boosting confidence.

Create a cup shape with your hand by bending your fingers slightly at the knuckles. Keep your wrists loose and bounce your hand off your body using the whole of your cupped palm. This is a vigorous movement that stimulates your blood flow. If you are cupping your limbs, always start from the bottom and work upwards in the direction of the heart. Cup each part of the body for a count of five before moving on. Repeat the whole sequence until you feel invigorated.

Tapping works on the same principle but should be kept for the smaller parts of your body, such as your scalp and forehead. Instead of using your palms, drum your fingertips rhythmically across the entire area. This should be an awakening sensation, so make sure you maintain a consistent and comfortable level of pressure.

Tapping and cupping can be done on a partner or on yourself, although you should avoid using this technique on the abdomen - your stomach is too delicate for this vigorous (and noisy!) motion.

4. Kneading

When you're tense or stressed your muscle fibres shorten. Kneading counteracts this by stretching and loosening the fibres, helping you to relax and unwind.

Create an arch with your thumb and fingers over the part of the body you are massaging. Then, using as much of your hands as possible in order to avoid pinching the skin, lift and roll the muscle between your fingers and thumb. Make sure your thumbs and fingers are working rhythmically together. Use one hand to knead small areas, two for large areas.

If you find that the muscles are too tense to lift and roll, gently knead the surface of skin and gradually increase the pressure. This can be painful at first, so adjust the pressure levels accordingly.

You can knead any part of the body (yours or your partner's) apart from the abdomen and face.

5. Pressure points

Static pressure can be used on every part of the body, although you'll find this technique particularly effective when applied to tense shoulders, inflexible necks and knotted backs. Avoid direct pressure on the bones, however, especially when you are working along the spine.

If you are working on your partner's back, you'll find certain spots are more tender than others. Where you encounter a particularly gristly knot (an area of hard or tight muscle), ask your partner to take a deep breath, then press it. You can use just a single thumb to apply static pressure but, for extra pressure, try placing one thumb on top of the other. If you're treating a larger area try using the index middle and ring fingers.

Be guided by your partner's reaction - keep checking they're comfortable with the level of pressure you're applying. Work your way slowly along the area you are treating, making sure you maintain a consistent level of pressure. Hold each pressure point for five seconds before gradually releasing. The movement needs to be slow and consistent to be effective.

Static pressure also works on the smaller areas you least expect. Try applying static pressure to your palm using your thumb, working your way around the entire palm.

Apply circular pressure if you want to really stretch out tense muscle fibres (but again, only concentrate pressure on muscles, not bones). For wider coverage, use the edge of your palm. Judge your pressure levels carefully - too light and you'll just be sliding on the surface of the skin, too hard and you'll feel nothing but pain. The circles should be slow and deliberate, so that the muscle has a chance to really relax.

6. Effleurage

This is long, languorous motion that should be used on the recipient's bare skin with oils or cream. Effleurage relaxes muscle tissue and increases the blood flow, and should be used at the beginning and end of a massage sequence. It has a wonderful calming effect on the body and helps establish a climate of trust between yourself and the recipient.

Start at the base of the back with your palms lying flat and your thumbs just touching. Apply a continuous level of pressure (be guided by the recipient on this) and begin to slowly push your hands up their back towards the neck, taking care not to put pressure directly on the spine. When you reach the neck, slide your hands apart along the shoulders. Come back down your partner's sides and return to the middle position at the base of the back. From here, slide out to the sides and come back to the centre. Aim to complete between five and eight full sequences.

Effleurage can be carried out on every part of your body. On limbs, make sure you work in the direction of the heart (ie creating pressure from the wrists/ankles upwards) and complete the sequence in one continuous movement without breaking contact.

· Watch Beata demonstrate all of these techniques online at theguardian.com/relaxation

Contra-indications: when not to massage

The sequences in this guide are designed to introduce you to the everyday benefits of massage. However, there are certain circumstances under which you should avoid giving them a go:

· If you have any painful bruises, fractures or open wounds

· If you suffer from serious and persistent back or neck pain

· If you've just eaten a main meal (wait at least an hour after eating before receiving a massage)

· If you're under the influence of alcohol or other drugs

· If you have a temperature (massage stimulates the body's metabolism, which can cause your temperature to rise even higher)

· Avoid directional work (pressure points) if you have varicose veins and only massage the surrounding areas very lightly

· If you are pregnant, it's important that any massage of your lower back and abdomen be very gentle in the first three months of pregnancy. Seek professional advice before using essential oils

If you're in any doubt at all, consult a doctor or professional therapist.

Before you begin ...

These simple sequences (most of which can be done by yourself) are great for combating the effects of a sedentary lifestyle, mild aches and pains and general weariness. They are preventive techniques, not miracle cures, designed to relieve temporary discomfort, tension, postural problems or stiffness. Before you begin, remember the following ...

· Don't attempt these massages if you are experiencing a stomach upset, if you have a temperature or are feeling dizzy. They won't ease your symptoms and could make you feel worse. Instead, try holding - a completely safe technique that will help you to make a mental connection between your hands and the painful area.

· Avoid massaging your neck and lower back if you have severe or recurrent pain in that area.

· Breathe deeply throughout the massage (think of breathing as an internal massage of all your organs). This will also give you a rush of oxygen which should help combat headaches and feelings of fatigue.

· As with all massages, find yourself a quiet, comfortable spot where you won't be interrupted. The sequence won't be nearly as effective if you aren't able to concentrate and feel distracted by thoughts or noises.