'The last time I told a lie was 'not guilty'' Photograph: Shirlaine Forrest/Getty Images Europe
'I often lie about my name. If you were called Lewycka, wouldn’t you? Usually I say Mary Lewis, but occasionally I branch out into something more exotic like Lucinda Firestorm' Photograph: Richard Gardner /Rex Features
'The most recent outright lie I told was to my publisher, about how fantastically well I was getting on with writing my current book' Photograph: Stuart Clarke/Rex Features
'I’m like everybody: if somebody says, ‘Do you like my new dress?’ I’m going to say, ‘Yes’' Photograph: Nils Jorgensen/Rex Features
'The only lie I ever tell is in answer to the question: ‘Can you come to my wedding/birthday party/baby’s christening?’ ‘Oh when is it? ... Oh damn I can’t.’ This has only gone wrong once, (and we put it in The Office) when someone where I used to work invited me to their party and I said: ‘Oh I can’t. When is it?’ The biggest ever white lie I had ready was when my mum was dying. If she’d have asked me if I’d thought there was a God, I’d planned to say ‘Yes. Definitely.’ She never asked. I wish she had' Photograph: Sam Urdank/PR
'I declined work by claiming that I was busy doing something else. And I didn't have to do it, my agent did it very politely on my behalf, so that lie was once removed. But it was me lying' Photograph: Tim Whitby/Getty Images
'Earlier today I said, ‘I’m ready, I’ll be down in a minute.’ But I was only getting in the shower. Half an hour later ...' Photograph: Gareth Cattermole/Getty
'I’ve never lied in all my life' Photograph: Nick Cunard/Rex Features
'My last lie was, ‘I am absolutely fine.’ But if you ask anyone over 70 how they are, and they say ‘I am absolutely fine’, they are lying' Photograph: David Hartley/Rex Features
