Tired? Aren’t we all! But have you ever thought it might be down to not getting enough sleep? I know it sounds incredible, revolutionary even, when four hours a night is the norm for high achievers, but the fact is, drowsiness can be a sure sign of sleep deprivation or what’s almost as bad, poor quality sleep or, as experts call it, “dirty” sleep.

Sure, it sounds weird, but as I learned to my cost, nature actually designed us to sleep 12 to 14 hours a day. Think you haven’t got time for paleo-sleeping? Well, listen. One day, I just fell fast asleep – yes, right in the middle of yoga. But when I came round, I thought I was at Pilates! Panic attack! When I told Kevin, my pelvic floor trainer, he immediately picked up on my distress and I was lucky enough to be referred as an emergency case to leading sleep hygienist, Dr Eugene Kwak. After just a week on his emergency Kwaknite Sleepclenze, my energy levels were incredible, my skin looked brighter and tauter. But I was one of the lucky ones. Just one or two more nights of poor sleep could have led to irreparable brain inflammation, obesity, impaired cognition and immovable cellulite.

So it’s entirely thanks to Dr Kwak that I’m around to share his top five pre-sleeping essentials. Rule one: never overtire yourself between sleeps. Thinking is the biggest no-no, and Dr Kwak warns against work of any kind, except for routine exercise and pampering. Regular clean-eating meals, plus a little fun socialising, should be the limits of your exertion until it’s time to destress and put on different bedtime garments such as Dr Kwak’s signature “pyjamas”. Two: close your curtains or, if you prefer, blinds. Three: create darkness by turning off the light. Four: stop looking at Instagram. Five: don’t forget to close your eyes! And for maximum benefit, invest in pillows stuffed with Dr Kwak’s golden, chemically-proven sleeping dust. While you snooze, the gold will seep into your skin, so you wake up like our ancestors, with a radiant glow, all ready to go straight back to bed.