My first compositions were imitations of Beethoven. Obviously, that wasn't working. Not until I was 27 did I feel ready to start composing. At that point I knew 20 instruments and was good on 12. I had a sound world in my head. It's a bit like looking at a blank page: as soon as you write a note, you have to write another. There's no choice. You could repeat the first, but that's too easy. Now there is no fear in my process because I've had success within myself. A blank piece of paper is exciting.

I'm trying to compose full-time. I'm not yet in a position to secure large commission fees. It's a struggle, but there's no alternative. A silent film score, say, is continual music, continual ideas. I need repetition, but not too much. It took six months to write a score for the film Faust.

I hear music when I walk. I'll hear a fast clarinet passage, drums beating, a throbbing pulse. Right, I think, I like the throbbing pulse. What can I add? It's very satisfying to create sounds out of nothing, and happiness is a kind of satisfaction. I carry my music around in my head. It's very personal, special. I have these babies I've created; perhaps they'll give someone else pleasure for three minutes or 15.

I don't have children. My compositions are creations and they will have a life of their own out there in the world without me. In 1987, when my first piece was being played in Germany, I was like a nervous parent. I feel proud of them.