At a certain age it becomes clear that you are probably never going to jump out of an aeroplane - provided, of course, there are other options. Simply by virtue of getting this old, I have already met Death halfway: I don't need to do any more.

But wait a minute: what if you could go skydiving without getting on a plane? Imagine a place where you could simulate the thrill of freefall in complete safety. Now - if you dare - imagine that it's in Bedford. Well, just outside of Bedford on an old MoD site, in a squat brick building with a giant metal chimney sticking out of it. It's not a chimney, though; it's a vertical wind tunnel. Welcome to Bodyflight Bedford, Britain's first skydiving simulator.

The wind tunnel was originally built to test aircraft in the 50s. Bodyflight have put in a new 4,000hp engine and a giant, five-bladed propeller capable of generating a 240kph wind. At 16ft in diameter, it's the biggest wind tunnel of its kind in the world, large enough for an eight-man formation team.

I get togged up and climb in. An instructor waits inside, standing on a wire-mesh floor. As per my brief pre-flight tuition, I assume an undignified flying squirrel position and fall through the door. The instructor grabs me by the belt and holds me floating on a column of air, bending my arms and legs into the correct pose. Through the windows other skydivers use sign language to instruct me to smile. As I open my mouth, saliva is driven up my face.

Eventually the instructor launches himself and we gracefully spiral up several feet. He lets go of me briefly and I find myself airborne and grinning like a moron. I can fly! When the novices have cleared out, several expert freefallers enter the tunnel and tumble about happily, like socks in a dryer.

Is this proper exercise? All the parachutists say it is. I am, I must say, rather sore after just five minutes. But it's an expensive way to keep in shape: my "double lesson" would normally cost £62, and tunnel time for accomplished flyers starts at £600 per hour. That's a lot of Pilates.

· Bodyflight Bedford: 0845 200 2925/Bodyflight.co.uk

Next week: Lucy Mangan meets her cross-trainer.