Lost in Showbiz has long boggled at Twitter's ability to reveal the truth behind the celebrity carapace. This week, the social networking site has thrown fresh light on the world of hip-hop, courtesy of the Wu-Tang Clan's Ghostface Killah, who let slip that behind the fearsome author of Assasination Day, Greedy Bitches and Whip You With a Strap lurks a man with an abiding interest in good dental practice. "I'm telling yall man. When you get up in the morning man don't just brush your teeth scrub your tongue," he began. "Scrub that fuckin halitosis off that tongue of yours. Word up! This is real talk right here."
These were merely the first in a 10-minute-long succession of tweets regarding the correct method of brushing your teeth. He swiftly moved on from the subject of scrubbing your tongue and the dire consequences that would follow if you failed to heed his advice – "Got that food tongue, wake up mouth smellin like shit son" – to other areas of good oral health. "Put some toothpaste on that shit, brush your teeth. Scrub ya lips man, all that shit," he wrote, uncannily mirroring the advice Lost in Showbiz was given the last time it visited the dental hygenist. He briefly returned to the topic of bad breath – "brush your teeth everyday cuz your mouth, y'all might not smell it but yall shit smelling like mad shit" – before moving on to the prevention of gum disease ("Brush your fuckin teeth man, do it hard man. Brush them shits til your gums bleed . . . Do something man") and importance of mouthwash ("Mattafact, this how you do it, throw some listerine in there too at the same time man. Your shit gon be on fire but it work") before signing off: "Words of wisdom from your man P.Tone! We in the building . . ."
Lost in Showbiz previously believed that the world of the rapper largely consisted of bling-blinging, throwing your hands up, pouring out a little liquor for Tupac and encouraging "hoes" to lick "deez nuts". It stands absolutely corrected, toothbrush in hand, eagerly awaiting advice on how to counteract athelete's foot from Sikk Tha Shocker and wondering if Young Jeezy might care to share any solutions he has for dealing with powdery mildew on rhododendrons.
