Over the next few weeks, many young people will be packing up for university for the first time. The train tickets are bought, the freshers’ Facebook groups have been joined. This can be a nerve-racking experience at the best of times and I vividly remember my own concerns when I set off to university for the first time: “Will I make any friends? Am I clever enough to be here? Is two towels enough?”

A question I never thought to ask was: how will I get help if I am sexually assaulted? But as Lady Gaga reminds us in the closing credits of her latest video, for the song, Til It Happens to You, in the US, “One in five college women will be sexually assaulted this year unless something changes.” As the lyrics to the song make clear, the enormity of this problem probably won’t seem real “til it happens to you”, but the figures in the UK are similarly stark. A 2010 report by the National Union of Students, Hidden Marks, found one in seven women students had experienced serious sexual or physical violence and 68% had been sexually harassed; a 2014 survey by the Cambridge University student union found almost a third of its students had been sexually assaulted.

Too often, statistics on sexual assault obscure the real people behind them, who need support. Since setting up the #NotGuilty campaign earlier this year, to give a voice to survivors of sexual violence following my own experience during my university years, I have become increasingly aware of how common an issue this is, and can say, with some experience, that we cannot afford to wait until it happens to us, or somebody we know, to educate ourselves about the available support services.

There is no “correct” way to get help after an assault, and it is important that the decisions of a survivor are respected, so that each step of the process – whether they report the assault, or seek professional help – is guided by what makes them most comfortable. What is certainly true is that there are many more options than one might think.

Surviving a sexual assault can feel hugely isolating, but there are many people out there who will listen. Sexual assault is not something that anybody should have to go through alone, and there is no shame in seeking help – whether for yourself or someone else. Too often, particularly at university, we become so driven by the question of what other people think, we forget that it is OK not to be OK – even years after a bad experience. Speaking out about a sexual assault, or being “brave”, does not mean that somebody is “over it” or not in need of support.

So where can we access support for ourselves, or someone who confides in us?

Visit your nearest Sarc (sexual assault referral clinic)

Most areas in the UK have a Sarc, a clinic that provides services to survivors of sexual assault, regardless of whether their case has been reported. As well as providing counselling, and often medical examinations if necessary, the specialist staff at Sarcs can assist you in making an informed decision about what to do next. The NHS has a directory to help you find the nearest Sarc to your postcode, and more information can also be found on the Survivors Trust website. Rape Crisis centres across the UK provide similar services, and also have a confidential helpline (0808 802 9999. 12-2.30pm and 7-9.30pm).

Access your university’s student welfare service

Universities across the country will all have a welfare network in some shape or form. The details tend to be found on the university’s student union page. Peer support schemes, university counsellors and welfare officers can be an invaluable way to access free support closer to home – even if it’s just to find someone to talk to. The National Union of Students also has officers for welfare, women, LGBT and social issues who can be emailed with questions regarding university welfare services.

Reach out to alternative support services

Since beginning the #NotGuilty campaign against sexual violence, I have been introduced to some fantastic alternatives to conventional support services. My Body Back is one organisation I have personally found incredibly useful, as it covers areas often overlooked by mainstream support services. Partnering with the NHS, the organisation recently set up a cervical screening clinic for women who have experienced sexual violence, with staff trained to recognise triggers and work with survivors. The organisation also runs workshops to help survivors enjoy sex again – an issue that faces almost every survivor and is commonly overlooked or, even worse, considered taboo. Other organisations that provide support services include Victim Support, Women’s Aid, Survivors UK (for male survivors) and Mind – a mental health charity that provides counselling for sexual abuse survivors.

Take as much time as you need

Lady Gaga’s song highlights some of the comments received by survivors of sexual assault – “You’ll be fine … it’ll get better in time.” Although these comments are often intended to be supportive, they can have the reverse effect of telling a survivor how they should feel, rather than listening to how they actually do feel. Every person responds differently to sexual assault: anxiety, fear, shame, depression, hyper-sexuality, hyper-alertness – these responses are all normal, and deserving of support.

Remember that it’s not all your fault

Self-blame is a brutally common and destructive effect of assault, but it is important to remember that blame or guilt are survival instincts that kick in to make you feel you had control over an uncontrollable situation. There isn’t anyone to blame for rape apart from the perpetrator, and it is important, if somebody confides in you, not to probe questions or ideas that imply otherwise.

What helped me? All of the above. But there are also day-to-day coping mechanisms that I have practised, or seen others practise. Having a safe, go-to person you can call when you feel triggered – if only to have a voice on the other end of the line who can bring you back to the present and away from ruminations. Writing about the experience to order your thoughts, to help express them to others, or even just to regain a sense of control – unlike a memory, a piece of paper can be torn up whenever you want. Reading the stories of others, to reiterate to yourself that you are not alone, and to discover what helped them – #NotGuilty has a Shared Stories project online, for instance. I stress again that there is no one remedy for healing after an assault, but finding what works for you is an important first step.

Bristol University has recently introduced a consent induction quiz; there are compulsory consent workshops now at many universities across the UK, and the NUS has been working on tackling “lad culture” – all of these are positive steps in the fight against sexual assault on campus. But so long as this issue persists we must also educate one another about the support that is available. If a professional support service doesn’t help, it doesn’t mean that nothing will.